Darker Side Of White...

2012-01-26T20:38:00.000+05:30

I seek the shadows of my past to answers the questions of tomorrow...

Neelgagan ka Parinda

2012-01-16T21:54:00.000+05:30

Subah ki pehli kirno ke saath athi toh woh,
Zor zor se pukar thi toh woh, na jane kisse dhund rahi thi woh,
Na jane kis des se ayi thi woh, kaun si zaban main bolti thi woh,

Subah ki roshni main woh neelgagan ka ek tara lagti thi woh,
Teekhe the uske nain, teekhi thi uski boli,
lekin subah ke us sotey jagtey samay main, ek shaant antral thi woh,

Na jane kaha gayi woh, ab na subah ati thi woh roz,
na jagati thi woh muje aur na hi suraj ki roshni main ab baat thi woh,
Kaha hai meri roshni ki leher ab? Kis des ki thi na malum muje, ab kaha dhundo ussey?
Dimaag kehta hai usne chod diya tera dar, par dil kehta hai woh yahi hai, dikhegi tuje woh kissi roz,
Man darpan hai to dil ayena, joh dekhoge wohi dikhega aur jo hai wohi samjehga,

2011-10-22T23:27:00.000+05:30

Everyone has it but me,
from the clashing clouds in the sky to the ravishing birds on the trees,
the season of reason is over, its all about finding a lover.

The cats and the mice

2011-09-12T01:16:00.000+05:30

One day not so long ago, there sat a princess cat named Mary near a sea shore in a city not far from here. She loved the early morning sea breeze gently touching her fur. She sat there with not a care in the world, she had just had a nice hearty breakfast of some pancakes that her mommy had made.

She suddenly smelled in the air a weird stench, she knew what it was but couldn't remember what it was, then she saw the source. A raggty little mouse had come near her and was sitting right by her side. She looked at him with her big round eyes. The little mouse smiled at her and she laughed at the way that little mouse smiled at her.

"Whats your name?", she asked. "They call me Ivan, Ivan the mice", he said. "Its mouse, not mice, how many people are you?", she said. The little mouse chuckled and offered her a piece of his candy. She took it from him with a smile.

The little mouse rubbed his little head on her leg to show his affection, the kitty in turn stroked his head with her tail. Since, then they met everyday by the sea shore. The mouse had a home just like hers but just like her he loved to sit by the sea shore and watched the sea. They talked a lot about many things, the kitty loved the mouse a lot. The little mouse in turn loved her so much that his day wouldn't start if he did not see her.

The mouse was as they say "special", the kitty new about it and always tried to help the mouse. The mouse was very smart but he had his share of problems, for one, he did not know what kind of mouse he was, and every time he decided to be one kind of mouse, the next day he would turn around become the same ol' kind of mouse. The kitty used to hear him out patiently, the kitty had another cat friend, her name was Fairy. She too joined them by the sea shore.

Fairy was a feisty little cat, all the cats, dogs and mice feared her for she could beat them to a pulp in a matter of seconds, yet they adored her because she was the best baker in town. If they had a party and had a cake, it had to be hers. Fairy, too heard Ivan with all the patience in the world. The two cats adored their little mouse friend, even though he was a little insane and at times used to get in fights with dogs and mostly used to get beaten up by them.

The cats tried everything they could to help this little mouse, but, the mouse took them for granted. He never really changed, he never really accepted the kind of mouse he was. The cats loved him a lot, but they were getting annoyed, for the mouse only listened to them and never acted on there advice.

The cats had there problems too, and the mouse was a patient listener but, his patience was not as deep as the cats and he often turned things around to him. The cats could never get through to him, even though they knew he loved them equally.

Years passed like this and the cats liked going to the sea shore and seeing the little mouse waiting for them, but they somehow detested his banter, for he would start off nice and then swing to his old talk. The place where they sat was no more a happy little place, the mouse who came in there lives riding on a rainbow, was now a mere obligation.

Fairy called one day Mary to her bakery and over a delicious fast of cookies, creamed coffee and pies, they discussed what to do with the mouse. The next day the mouse went to the sea shore and saw the kitties sitting on a different rock, he tried reaching that rock but he couldn't for he was too small for that rock.

He smiled at the kitties but they looked the other side, the little mouse went back and sat on that little rock where they all sat once and wept. He wept all day and all night, the kitties came every morning and saw him from the distant rock, he too saw them with his teary eyes, but he never dared to go near them. He left them little messages by the rock and the kitties read all his messages.

Then one day the kitties went to the distant rock and looked to the rock where they once sat, the mouse was not there, he did not come the next or they day after or as a matter of fact ever again. The kitties one day decided to go to that rock and see for themselves.

On the side of the rock lay a bottle with a little message in it, they took it out and read it aloud.

"To my Mary and Fairy Di,

You welcomed me in your heart when all the doors all over the world were closed to me, you nurtured me when I needed someone the most. You were my sunshine when I needed the sun, you were my raindrops when I needed the rain. You stood by me when I was down and you stood by me when I was high. I on the other hand took you for granted, I lied to you. I wanted your pity, I wanted your hugs and I wanted your attention. I was selfish, I never realized how much you two meant to me. Now I have lost the two most important things in my life and instead of doing something about it, I cried. I first hated you two for ignoring me, then I begged you two to take back, then I wept some more. But, now I realize sometimes the people who love you the most don't necessarily have to be with you to show you how much they care for you. I have to go on a journey now, I have to travel to a place where I always said I wanted to go but never dared to go, I will now go there all by myself and fins myself.

I wish that this journey teaches me who I really am, the mouse you met not so long ago was not a bad mouse,but, a lost mouse. A mouse who took you two for granted. The mouse who will come back, will be a different one, this mouse will love you the way you loved him. This mouse will make his sisters proud. Till then this mouse will not bother you two, he will always love you and by this rock he will leave you a message from time to time to tell you how he is and will hope you two might do the same.

I will talk to you once, I become something in life which is much more deeper than the kind of mouse I am, I can be any kind of mouse, till the time I am happy and I move beyond all this to a far better place in life. I know how much you cared for me and how selfish I got. I am like the kids in Fairy's bakery who don't understand how much sweet is enough for them.

To end this letter, all I want to say is thank you for being there and always being there! and thank you for throwing me out of your lives, I hope one day I come back to you as a better mouse.

Love
Ivan Bo- The Mice :')

When We Two Parted - Lord Byron

2011-08-07T14:58:00.000+05:30

To Emptiness:
WHEN we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.

The dew of the morning
Sunk chill on my brow —
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame:
I hear thy name spoken,
And share in its shame.

They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me —
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee too well: —
Long, long shall I rue thee,
Too deeply to tell.

In secret we met —
In silence I grieve,
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee? —
With silence and tears.

Khat

2011-08-01T05:29:00.001+05:30

Kabhi tere se baat karne ke liye seher tak rukta tha main,
ab toh teri parchaiyo ko chune se darta hu main,
teri yaadon main roz kahin kho jata hu, us din ko yaad karke gumsum sa mayus hokar khush ho jata hu,
hur roz sochta hu ki kuch alag kaha hota yah alag sa kuch sama hota, toh aaj tum bhi mere paas hote,
ab toh bus ek chere ki parchai hai, jin ankhon main guma tha main uske agey kale badal ki chadar bich gayi hai,
dur lagta hai us parchai ko dekh kar, yaad hi hai teri, yaad karne ki koshish bhi karta hu par na tu dikhti hai, na tu sunti hai, aur nah hi ab dil main woh tez dhadkan hoti hai, ab toh bus us kali chadar ko uthane ki koshish hoti...
Roz niklta hu, sabse milta hu, sab kuch karta hu, par darta hu ki kahin kissi roz hum mill na jae,
Dil kehta hai tu mod pe hi khadi hai, ussi kesari boj ke saath, intezar main meri, main ata toh hu roz,
par sirf ek parchai hi milti hai, rukta hu toh bebasi milti hi, chalta hu toh baichaini.
Kya ek jhoot ki saza maut se bhi battar hoti hai, dozzak main bhi jagah na mille, samundar main pani na mille, dhoop main bhi sardi lage, kya yeh kam nahi!

Neend toh ab ati nahi, ankh band kaise karu jab tumhari yaad jati hi nahi, chal pada hu kissi nai manzil par,
par tumhari galli dil se nikalti nahi, woh bhi maaf kar deta, par tu nahi,
Woh bacha toh mar gaya hai, par yeh abhi bhi zinda hai, char saal se zinda hai, par mara hua hai.

Sooraj ki chandni

2011-06-27T13:31:00.000+05:30

Ab nahi dikhte tare raat main, na dikhti hai chandni,
bus leheron ke saath behta ja ra ha hu, samundar main gota marne ki saza pa raha hu,
doobne ka man hai par dooba nahi jata, mann toh hai bohot par ab dooba nahi jata.

Ab nahi dikhta hai ugta hua sooraj, na milti hi subah subah ki thandi hava,
ab toh soobah hoti hai dupher main, raat hoti hai seher main,
angrezo ki hukumat ab doobta nahi hai humara suraj, sirf lagta hai ki hum doob rahe hai,
naukri ke naam pe saza bhog rahe hai, pischar banke dharti pe rom rahe hai.

Cigarette ke dhooe ko chewing gum ke mint se chupa rahe hai,
sharam nahi hai phoonkne main, par garv bhi nahi hai
Coffee aur chai se apni insani dhaanche ko chalne ki koshish kar rahe hai,
palake jhapakne ke ehsas hota hai toh Red Bull bhi peene pe majbur hote hai.

Na dikhti hai ab ghas pe jami oas ki chadar, ab toh neend se jung main hi fasa rehta hu,
Khwabo ko sajne ke liye nahi karte hai yeh hum, sirf ghar chalne ke liye hai majbur hum,
Agar khel-kud lete toh aaj ban jate nawab, pad likh liya hai isliye ab bhool gaye hai sab khwab,
Koi shayar tha, koi tha kadrdaan, aur koi tha mehmaan, ab sab hai pashan.

Ab Chandni nahi dikhti hai raat main, dikhta hai toh sirf chaiwala aur uske haath main humari brand ki cigarette,
Dhooe ke zindagi, dhooe main hi ek din gum ho jayegi, benami main paida hoke gumnaami main mil jaegi.

Queen

2011-05-28T00:45:00.001+05:30

Not a man, not a woman, just somewhere stuck between,
just a joke for others and for some a drag queen.

What fault is it of mine, that I am stuck in between,
beyond the jokes there lives a girl, shy and broken,
what's granted for you is freedom for me.

I don't choose to be this way, a woman in a man's cloak,
I go by many names these days, but none which is mine,
I want to break away from it all, wake up and be who I am,
and not just a joke, I am not a man, not a woman, just somewhere stuck between,
make as much fun as you want too, but at the end I am still a queen.

Loving him...

2011-05-11T12:06:00.000+05:30

I fell for him,,
I don't know why.

A simple touch will do it all
His warm embrace is what I want

His smell lingers on me now,,
Thank God it does.
Maybe now I'll sleep tonight imagining him right by my side.

Perfect friends is what we are.
In love with him why did I fall..?

Mann

2011-03-20T01:51:00.000+05:30

Tootne ke kram main bohot kuch toot chuka hai,

Kuch toot gaya hu aur kuch toot raha hu,

Jane kis bawandar main kho sa raha hu,

Naiya ko ley aya hu majhdar main, ab na agey ja pa rahu hu na peeche jane ki icha hai,

Subah hoti hai ab duphar main, sandhya rat main, aur rat kabh ati hai kuch hosh nahi,

Sab tapta hai dhoop main lekin yeh nahi, chaah kar bhi tapa nahi pa raha isse,

Dekhne main sab pak hai, lekin chootey hi sab maila,

Andar se kharab hai aur bahar puta hai chuna,

Safed hai kapda lekin kaal hai dil,

Aaj bhi kal aaj aur kal main hi phasa hu,

na jane iss main se kab niklunga,

sapne toh hai jahan ke, lekin hakeekat ni kahin ki,

hope

2010-08-05T22:53:00.000+05:30

New day tries to dawn,

the sun hopes to shine,

the rains wish to end,

the sky tries to part,

the past begins to leave,

but is he to let go?

2010-03-01T23:14:00.000+05:30

I take two step forward and one step back
all this while I am moving ahead yet going back
I don't know why or for whom?
the chains of yesterday hangs still in gloom
I wish I could break them...

Fantasia

2010-02-07T23:37:00.000+05:30

It had been quite sometime since she had last met him, the whole idea of going all the way back to where in a way it all began was quite discomforting for her. It seemed as if it was only yesterday when the two of them parted ways, she remembered every single word she said, except his face. It had been ten years now, in a way a curse she had herself put on him. She drove her old car which was what she drove away from him ten years ago, she had that yellow bag with her as well, the one which now carried something that would set her free from him forever.

He had called her some ten days ago to meet and she agreed without thinking twice, she had to put an end to all of this. She had too much at stake now and he was the only one who could ruin it all. It was he who had ruined a major part of her life some ten years ago and it took her ten years to reach where she wanted, now she wouldn't let the same man take it all away.

He was an important man now, people loved him and respected him, she was also an important woman, people also loved her and respected her but they also feared her. He was a man who commanded respect and she was a woman who demanded it. For him, the pen was mightier than the sword and for her it was her sword alone.

He was now a rich business man and she was a contract killer. She hunts while he is hunted. The media hunts him where ever he goes. It was befitting that ten years down the line she got the contract to take him out and it was he himself who called her up to meet. The prey walked into the hunters nest. She knew what she had to do and she was the best at it.

He stood there in the darkness of the night, the market behind him was closed and the parking lot was empty, the lone security guard was bribed to leave the area. He stood next to his black Dodge Viper and wore a black suit. He travelled in a cavalcade where ever he went and had more security than the President of United States. He was a banker and an important man for everyone who wanted there black to turn white. She knew about his stature and wondered why the mafia, the businesses or even the politicians would want such a man dead.

She drove into the parking lot and saw the lone man in suit standing next to an expensive sports car, she knew it was him. He had changed a lot and the media was underplaying when they claimed he was more charming than the devil, he was really the devil himself. She parked the car next to his car and walked across to him.

He peered into her eyes and she felt a chill go up her spine, the warmth and innocence those eyes once had was all gone, he was not the man she met ten years ago, he was not even a man now, he was the devil himself. She tried to reach for her gun kept loaded in her yellow bag, but something or someone stopped her for doing so.

He came closer to her and said, "I was expecting you!", She looked to him in dismay, his voice had lost the childishness and playfulness it had once, this was the devil talking in his deep baritone. "You walked right where I wanted you kid", she said to him.

"Kid!", he laughed, his laughter echoed like the devils laughter. "I am not a kid, not anymore! I am not even human! I am the devil", he spoke in his devlish baritone. She knew it all along, he was now the devil and she had to take him out now, before the devil took over her as well.

He took out a black rose from his coat's pocket and gave it to her. "La Spina Della Rosa Sono Nascote Del Fiore! remember?", he said to her. The thorns of this black rose were also hidden by its bloom and one of the thorns pricked her thumb and it started to bleed. He took a drop of her blood from her hand and dropped it on the road.

She reached for the gun slowly and this time she took it out and aimed it right at his heart. He walked closer and closer till the metal rod of the gun touched his chest. She felt her hands trembling. She had to shoot before the devil got into her. She closed her eyes and pulled the trigger. The single shot ripped through his heart and exited out and broke the glass window of his Dodge Viper. The deafening sound of the gunshot made her ears ring and she felt deaf. He dropped down on the ground where he had dropped her blood. He lay there still, without any movement. She looked down at him and a single tear came out of her eye.

It was all over now, the devil himself was dead. She walked up to her car and sat inside, she started the engine and drove the car out of the parking lot. He sat next to her and said, "Thank you for killing the devil". She could not believe her eyes that he was sitting right next to her, she had just shot him or had she? But he was dead! lying frozen on that cold parking lot floor. She suddenly saw a blinding bright light and then she felt the ringing sound coming back into her ears , she closed her eyes and now could feel her breath against her body.

A man walked up to the coffee shop at the Delhi Airport and bought two cups of coffee and went back to his chair where his wife was eagerly awaiting for him. They watched the lounge's television on which the man read out the news, "In other news a drunk woman had an head on collision with a truck and died on the spot, and in business news the most powerful banker of India just bought himself a new Dodge Viper and was spotted driving at high speeds in the old town."

"The biggest game the devil ever played was to convince everyone he doesn't exist", said the woman to the man. "Yes! but do you like the color of my new Dodge?", the man replied. "Yes its great! but I need to get my ears checked they are still ringing", she said. "Mam! is this yellow bag yours?", said the flight assistant to the woman.

Zeba my wife

2009-11-28T11:32:00.000+05:30

I've been married for three years now. I met my wife on a beautiful sunny winter afternoon at the Tughlaqbad Fort. She was a part of a photography group and I was part of a one man beer drinking group. The fort is by far the best place to have beer, it is secluded, gloomy and it has an air of royalty to it. Build by the perhaps the most misunderstood rulers of the Slave Dynasty. I guess we both share the same title of being misunderstood.

"You know it is illegal to have alcohol inside a national monument", she shouted at me, I retorted "So is making housing colonies! No one stopped them". She was quite unfazed by my comment and somehow she did see my point and also the fact I wasn't a dehati. English is a funny language, once the language of the slaves of the British Empire, it is now the language of education and pedigree.

"Well you seem educated! Why don't you go to a pub?", she asked me.
"And you seem like a photographer! Why aren't you clicking supermodels?", I thought this was the funniest line I could ever come up with, beer does make you feel invincible.

"I am a nature photographer and this place is full of natural beauty", she replied.
"Yes it is! Now do you want some beer?", I asked her quite shamelessly.
"Ohkay!", she said.
"Here!", I opened a can and hand it to her.
"So whats your name?",she asked me.
"Sanjeev! and yours?", I replied.
" Zeba", she answered.

This is the beginning of a wonderful friendship, it seemed to me. I exchanged numbers with Zeba and after a week she called me up. "Hi Sanjeev! Remember me?", she asked me expectantly.
"Of Course, Zeba", I replied.

"I want to invite you for a small exhibition of my photographs in the Aga Khan Hall on Saturday 7pm, can you make it?", she said. "Yea sure! 7 pm na! I will be there", I excitedly replied her and then she cut the call as if some more sweet words would've eaten up her balance.

"Amazing pictures Zeba!"
"Seriously?", she questioned me.
"Yes! I mean this leaf looks so lovely and the lighting is so...is so... I mean lovely".
"Wow! you are a regular critic", she retorted.

"Zeba wanna have coffee sometime? maybe next week?", I did not what else to say.
"Sanjeev I have coffee daily! Why don't you take me for coffee now?", she threw a bouncer at me. "Now! and your exhibition?", I asked her with an expression of a confused puppy. "I had only one picture on display Sanjeev and this leaf you're staring at isn't mine", she was now throwing overhead deliveries.

"So which one is yours?", I asked her. "The one with the guy drinking beer in the shadow", she replied. In the corner of the exhibition hall was a photograph of a man with a can of beer in his hands and shadow of the fort had covered him like a blanket and only the can reflected a small refraction of the sun's light. "The Silver Lining", the title of the photograph read. I was happy, sad and confused all at the same time.

"I took you advice and clicked a model, Mr. Sanjeev", she said breaking my chain of thoughts.
"Its...its me? I mean wow, its way better than that sucky leaf and I mean wow", I said.
"Hmm... So coffee Mr.Supermodel? My treat! Since you won me the contest", Zeba said.
"You won? Seriously? Wait till my mom knows about this!! Her son is actually good for something!", I said excitedly.

We went out for coffee and she paid and we talked for hours together. We met seven or eight times after that and then I took her too Nizammudin's Dargah. This is where I realized what Zeba meant to me "A beautiful gift from heaven" and that very night I asked her hand in marriage.

Her family initially objected to the communion, but when I convinced them that I truly loved her and also the fact Zeba might be pregnant, they allowed us to get married. The marriage happened in a great haste as I truly did not want her to find out that I told her parents she was pregnant and also I did not want her to change her mind.

We have now been married for three years and I still did not know what my wife did for a living except for her random photography projects in and around the city.

2009-10-23T23:03:00.000+05:30

He kept on staring at the screen, he did not know what he wanted or what was he looking for anymore. The cursor kept blinking, a silent reminder of time slipping through his hands. It had been more three years now an yet, he was the same. He had evolved, but on the inside he was still pretty much the same. His head was feeling heavy and like every other time, this time too he felt sick to his stomach just reminiscing those old thoughts. He needed something more, something exciting and yet something old. Who was he fooling he thought to himself.

Strangers in the night

2009-07-10T21:54:00.000+05:30

"To live in the hearts of those we love is never to die", he liked reading her epitaph every time he visited her grave. It was more of a ritual now for him, every Wednesday he went first to the local flower shop and got her favorite Tulips and then to the graveyard where she rested.

He used to walk the entire distance from home to the graveyard, but today he felt like driving, it had freshly rained and the wind was pleasantly blowing and it made him smile a bit.
Perhaps for the first time in the past two years he had a genuine smile on his face, he had lost interest in laughing and had a fake grin for the people around him.

He opened the car and gently placed the tulips on the passenger's seat. He switched on the radio and it played the song he always sang for her , "Strangers in the night, exchanging glances ". It brought a tear in his eyes and a smile on his face.

He sped across the damp roads , deliberately speeding on puddles and splashing water all over. He parked the car near the graveyard's entrance and went in, making his way through the graves of other dead people. She was not a christian but she wanted a burial and he just wanted her, but god only listened to her. She got her burial sooner than anyone could imagine.

They had only met about two years ago, he was then a young boy about finish his master's and on the verge of finding a job for himself. She was the one who interviewed him for his 'dream job'.

He fell in love with her the moment he entered the small interview room, which he thought resembled a Nazi interrogation room. She asked him a series of questions and he gave a series of blistering retorts, the comedians on television would have just said "he was on a roll", but, he knew what he was on and it was her smokey black eyes.

She could not resist laughing out like baby getting his tummy rubbed with a feather. He loved to make her laugh, even when he wanted to cry.

The office romance soon transformed into serious talks of marriage, but that could not happen. Her father wanted an army boy and he had not even seen Lakshaya or Prahar to make matter worse. The saga that unfolded was one straight out a Bollywood pot-boiler. He ran away with her and her mother. Her mother was a witness in the court for their marriage, she returned home later. They both then ran away from the city with his two dogs to Mumbai.

The girl had never told anyone about the times she coughed out blood and she never intended to tell him, till one day he found her blood stained handkerchief in her handbag. He took her to the hospital, but the doctors told him, it was of no use. She was going back to god forever and had only a few months with her.

They both cried all night long and for the first time he could not make her stop crying nor could she make him crack a joke. Then on the following morning, she decided to plan her own funeral.
She asked a famous Delhi designer to make her a lehenga, he made the best lehenga of his career, but,this time it was not for a wedding.

She booked the caterers for her funeral, the caterers made the best food in the world and this time they did not put baking soda in chanas, nor did they use superbhaiya oil for the cooking.

She wrote herself and obituary, like no other ever written before, this time she did not Google her story and edit it, this time it was her heart bidding adieu to the world.

She just made him promise one thing and that was to find himself someone else, he promised her one thing , that he would break that promise. She asked him to always smile and spread happiness, he smiled when she took her last breath.

She decided the spot, for where she wanted to rest for eternity, it overlooked all the other graves and was under old gulmohar tree, the graveman told her with teary eyes, you would need to get your grave cleaned, as the tree sheds a lot of leaves, she told him not to clean them up as the tree was just showering his love onto her.

He parked the car in the nearly empty lot, not many people came to the graveyard on Wednesdays, he did and he did so every Wednesday. That was the day she passed away. He walked into the graveyard and crossed all the other graves till he reached hers. He wiped the grave off the tiny leaves with his own hands and kissed the ground. A tear drop fell from his eyes onto the tiny green grass growing on her grave. He rested the Tulips on her tombstone and lit an incense stick and closed his eyes.

The groundsmen found him smiling as if he had just been given the greatest happiness of his life. He was buried next to her the following day, once the post mortem was done by the police. They found nothing, except for the fact it was body which had no soul.

The groundsmen can at times hear the two laughing, at times lying under the Gulmoher tree and times singing "Strangers in the night, exchanging glances". She planned her death, he planned their reunion.

Soul Case

2009-06-01T21:29:00.000+05:30

She paced around nervously in the marbled foyer, she could see her reflection in the freshly polished floor. "It would be alright madam, its an open and shut case , I still do not understand why this case has even reached this far", said the man in a black overall to her.
She did not look up to him ,she knew what she had been charged for and she knew even if she escapes from the hands of the court , she can never escape from the crime she committed.

"All Rise, the Supreme Court of India under the special chair of Chief Justice of India is now in hearing for the case , Ivan Saint v/s Cadence Emphito ", the bailiff announced the arrival of the judge and the case in one breath. It was said to be the case of the century, for never had such a case ever been filed by any person anywhere in the world.

The scribes had gone crazy working overtime on every single factoid they could find about the case, the complainant , the plaintiff and most importantly the mysterious man who was the lawyer of the complainant. No one knew of this lawyer and even though he was said to be the world's oldest practicing lawyer , it was hard to believe that such a lawyer ever existed.

Many people believed this entire case was a waste of time and wanted the world to concentrate on more serious issues like death, plague etc.

"In 35 years of my practise , I have never heard of such a case and I feel both honored and frightened in taking the chair of the man who decides the fate of this case, I feel it is my moral obligation to ask the complainant if he would like to withdraw this case, for it is such a case where I can do nothing but ask the almighty to guide me",the judge spoke in the microphone with all the courage he could muster in his small framed body.

"My client refuses to take withdraw , your honor", the mysterious lawyer spoke as he walked into the court wearing an all black suit with a black shirt and a red tie. He limped a little and had a red wood stick to support his limp. The complainant walked in, almost dragging himself as if he had no life in either of his legs. He had not taken a bath in days and smelled of urine. His hair was sooty and his shoes were torn and one could see his blackened toes.

"W..well, then let us call in the accused"replied the judge.

She came in wearing a white knee length dress with yellow polka dots and wore huge whit sung lasses over her eyes. She was accompanied by a man who wore a traditional lawyer's uniform. He was the best lawyer in the country and she gave him every single penny she had to fight this case.

Two years ago when this case came first to sessions court, it was ridiculed and thrown in the garbage and then when this mysterious lawyer was hired by the complainant , things moved faster and faster and now the case was in the Supreme court of India.

"I would like to inform your sir , that the complainant has refused to withdraw the case", the judge explained quite apologetically to the plaintiff's lawyer.

Before anyone could speak further the mysterious lawyer spoke "I would like to examine Miss.Cadence". The judge asked her to step in to the witness box and she was made to take an oath on the Holy Bible.
"Miss.Cadence, do you believe that you did not kill his soul! , you are under oath may I remind you", he said to Cadence in the harshest voice any man could take out from this throat.
"I... just don't get it, I mean how can I do such a thing, a soul is mythical, he is just deranged " she replied to the mysterious lawyer.
"So he is deranged!! he is a retard now for you!! what next do you want , that we finish his body too, isn't killing the soul enough!!" he shouted back at her and then looked to the judge and said "They say your honor , that the soul never dies, but here in our case, this woman killed a man's soul, she ripped his heart and trampled his mind and brutally bludgeoned his soul, she should be punished my lord and not only punished the law should make an example out of her".

"I object your honor, this man is making a case of a man losing his nerves in to that of murder , no not murder even more than murder sir!!", Cadence's lawyer shot at the judge.
"Objection overruled", retorted the judge who some how did not know why he even said that when he wanted this mysterious lawyer to stop himself.

"She made this man become her friend and then used her own grief to make him lover her, care for her and then when she felt she was bored , she threw him out of her life and accused him for being a liar and cheat. Her acidic turned poured... no not poured in fact she drowned him in the filth which came from the acidity of her words. Words which no human shall ever use for another and yet she used it knowingly that this would burn him. She is a cold blooded murderer, she did it all to satisfy her own ego." the mysterious lawyer made a long statement and then paused and walked over to her and glazed in to her teary eyes and then sat down on his chair.

Ivan urinated and the stench made it unbearable for anyone to stay in the room and it had to be cleaned before the case proceeded. This time Cadence's lawyer bounced into action
"My lord, my client did no such thing, this man who is now no more than a living vegetable did this all to himself, he was the one who lied to her about his sorrow's when my client told him so much about herself.
He wanted to her to love him and was allured by my client's beauty. She did not want his love and simply had asked him to leave with the fruits of passion which she did not long for, she is innocent."

"Innocent enough to unknowingly murder a man's soul my fellow!! she murdered a soul and not a body , the blood is on her hands but we can't see them with the eyes of physicality! We need to peer in to this woman's face and see the blood stains all over acidic tongue. " retorted the mysterious lawyer.

The girl cried even louder and now she was trying to go eye to eye with Ivan , she longed for Ivan's forgiveness, but she could not get it, for she knew she had killed his soul and it was only a matter of minutest before the judge would sentence the killing of her own soul.

Cadence wanted redemption and at last she spoke " I do not know what came over me ... I liked Ivan a lot ...Maybe it was the DEVIL", she knew now somehow people might believer her as the devil always played such tricks and in this case as her lawyer had said this was her Trump Card.
" The devil has no hand in this my lord", said the mysterious lawyer.
"How can you be so sure ?"asked the judge.

The clouds outside covered the sun , the lights inside the rooms went off and then the lawyer's face glowed in the dark in deep red and he said "for it is I the devil who is defending this man and also my name, for even I cannot do such a condemned act, a wretched soul is only tortured by me , but never killed, she is beyond me !", the clouds cleared and the lights were back on , everyone now knew that this was not any ordinary case anymore and the girl was not an ordinary criminal either.

"Miss. Cadence I do not have any doubt now that you are guilty but I still give you one last chance to speak the truth and pray for mercy", the judge said to Cadence in a stern voice.

Cadence wiped her tears and let her fangs out from her mouth and said, "He loved me, I hated it, how could he love me, he looks so ugly, I am a princess and he is nothing more than a peasant , I used him for I had work from him , if he thought my pity was love then who am I to blame, his soul did not die from my hands, it died because he was foolish enough to love a woman who love no one but herself.He caused too much negativity, what could I have done!"

The judge looked at Ivan who had been foaming from his mouth and said "Ivan speak now and decide this case , I shall do as you say."
Ivan got up and dragged himself over to Cadence and looked into her eyes which were bright red and said "I forgive you Cadence, you are not a bad person" and he collapsed on the floor, the devil went to help him up but he could not , Ivan was foaming from his mouth and his eyes sunk in. He was dying.

The sky parted and the sun went bright , brighter and then it became so bright that it felt as if the sun was on earth. The light parted and a man walked in to the court room, the devil bowed down and everyone else followed suit except for Cadence who was still sitting on the chair and Ivan who lay on the floor clutching his stomach and foaming from his mouth.
"I bless you my child and like the devil said the soul never dies, yours did not either, come get up and embrace your soul" , Ivan got up and embraced Cadence.
The body and the soul were one again.

786

2009-04-22T09:24:00.000+05:30

He parked his bike outside a huge glass structure which resembled an upright match-box. This was where this Indian transformed into a Yankee. This was where he was a salesman to the world . He was about to say good-bye to the calmness of the night and enter the day-light of brigth flurosenct lights.
When Pt.Nehru said in his famous speech a "tryst with destiny", that 'India shall awaken' and now some 60 years hence , India awakens to 'sell' and 'service' the very people who once took it as a "white-man's burden" to alleviate us poor dark skinned people. Well they did do a great job and in some ways thats what drove their great grandkids out of a job.
History aside, all Mohd. Ismail aka Mike Irvin , employee no.-1418 cared was about completing his targets before the shift ended. He wanted to get that IJP for the post of an SME.
Sales was never hard for this +2 pass who had never seen a management college or even heard of Philip Kotler. In some ways these "callcenter ke bache" outdid most of the MBAs, they knew how to sell and thats what made real hard cash for the big companies.

Ismail walked into the hustle and bustle outside the gates of KNS Teleserves Ltd. The guard was busy shouting at the cabbies to move their cars and let the other ones come in. The greatest job puller for the call centers were these cabs which picked and dropped thousands of tele-callers to their homes.

"Hey Mike!!" , came a shout from a long haired guy who looked like a girl if it wasnt for his pencil thin french beard. "Oi Chutiye , kaisa hai tu" , Mike replied . "Bhenke.. gaali toh mat de" replied the long haired guy.
"Ro mat Keith", Mike said teasingly. Keith was the alias of Mr.Krishna Kumar Yadav, MA(hindi) from Patna University. Keith was in many terms still the average Bihari babu , but he had acquired a unique mix of Brit-Bhojpuri accent which didnt go well with many Indians but the Scottish could understand him as if he was their "kilt buddy".

If only

2009-04-05T21:54:00.000+05:30

If only I could do it all over again
this time I wouldn't have caused you so much pain
I would've washed off all my tears in the rain

If only we could do it all over again
the times we shared, the chats we had, the childishness we clad
I still walk past the shadows hung the dust of time
wondering if all that I did was such a big crime

Times has flown like the river unknown
if only i had known
I would've done it differently

If only I could do it all over again
this time it wont go in vain
I shall wait till the end of times
to rekindle what was once so divine

My tears have dried up but the soul still cries

If only ...

786 In the name of Allah!!

2008-10-11T21:42:00.001+05:30

It was a cold and dark night, the kind of night when lovers walked hand in hand and loners walked as swiftly as they could to reach home. The moon shined in the sky like a bright oil lamp, occasionally being covered by the dark clouds moving east. He had just left from home for work, he closed the front door of his small house and came outside, he felt a slight shiver on his spine, the cold had set in this once warm summery night.
He went up to his bike and took out his keys from his backpack and started his five year old Enfield Bullet which he had bought on a loan, today was the first day this bike was actually "his" , just today in the morning he got a notice from the bank saying his loan was finished and he would get his papers.
He thanked Allah for blessing him with a lovely job which took care of most of his expenses. He got out of the driveway and rode into the silent night. His strong 500cc engine roared like a hungry lion on his way out for a night hunt. He loved this time of the year as it brought so much joy around the world, this was the holiest of holy month of Ramzan. Ramzan always brought a smile to his face, he reminisced the days when he used to go to Jama Masjid for the Maghrib (evening prayer)and then the food which he so dearly loved.
A shrill sound broke his chain of thoughts and he looked around to see what had happened, a truck had just pulled across the street and the sound of its breaks had made his heart rush, he laughed at his cowardice.

Broken Glasses

2008-04-05T21:05:00.000+05:30

Broken are the windows of the past
shattered are the glasses of yesterday strewn in my path
walking on those pieces I cut my soul
everyday I walk on them for a greater good
for brighter tomorrow and a better me
yet they hurt yet some pieces get stuck
all I wish is I cross this path one day...

Corners

2008-02-29T19:38:00.000+05:30

In the corners of my mind lies a shadow
A shadow of love a shadow of remorse
and shadow of hate,
A shadow of of my past and a shadow of what is yet to come,

In the corners of mind lies a sorrow
A sorrow of hope, a sorrow of despair
A sorrow of the lies , a sorrow of those scary eyes

Random

2008-02-06T12:30:00.000+05:30

I die a thousand death each day,
a thousand more each night
a thousand more when i see someone in plight,
i am not god and i dont want his job,
i dont know why we hurt when we should be happy,
i dont know why we cry when we know we all have to die,
i am not sure about llife itself and weather i deserve to live it,
i am not god but human , then why should i be perfect?

Thoughts

2008-02-06T12:17:00.000+05:30

Standing in the shadowy lanes,
I see you walk past me,
I see you talking to the birds,
I see you jumping in the rain,
I feel you in sorrow,
I feel you in happiness,
I see the sun shine in your eyes
and the moon dance in your hair...

The shadows love me,the truth hates me,
the soul I once had is back in me
the rape I had once received is behind me
I am not happy but I am not sad either,
I am not alive but I haven't died just yet,
the hope is still there for the unknown to happen,
I am still not shallow, I am just empty...

The ugly Rose

2008-01-04T12:06:00.000+05:30

There was once a rose in an enchanting garden
he lived in a lovely meadow of flowers,
he was not a beautiful rose, it was not a velvety red rose,
it was dull and dark but it did not have any thorns,
all the flowers made fun of him and no bee ever came to it
he lived alone all day long , praying that gardener plucks him and throws him away so that he can die in peace .
Then one day came a bee who was from a far off place and reached the garden late , all the other bees had taken all the roses and plants and were joyously sucking there nectar.This bee saw the rose in the corner of the garden , she didn't know what to do as she needed nectar .She went to this ugly rose and said "May I take some nectar from you? , the rose was shocked no bee had ever spoken to him this way or as matter of fact no bee had ever even looked at him.He replied "Y...yess b..but I don't think my nectar will be of any use to you, I am just an ugly rose".
She said to him"So what I am not the most beautiful bee in the meadow..." and she took his nectar.The rose had a lot of nectar in him and the bee came to him regularly for nectar.They became good friends and they talked a lot and slowly and slowly the rose started glowing again.It was a small glow but the gardener was happy to see the rose had finally started to bloom.
Then one day the rose
developed a thorn , it wasn't his fault and when the bee came it pricked her and she bled a little.The bee thought the rose had done this on purpose and she said to him "You are liar , you said you had no thorns and now you have a thorn that you had hidden to prick me so that I die..."
The rose was shocked as he did not get what she meant by that and he wept in front of her and said "I am sorry its not my fault god made me this way if a rose doesn't have thorns how can it protect itself form the world."
To this the bee got angry and said"You think I would harm you and that's why you grew that thorn on you , to warn me , I know roses like you , who deliberately act pitiful for innocent bees like us, we are not even friends you are just an acquaintances to me, I just happened to come to you as all the other roses were taken by other bees..."
Saying this the bee flew away to another rose and the ugly rose wept and wept and he lost all his luster and sheen , he saw the bee everyday and he couldn't say anything to the bee .She had made a new rose her friend and she took his nectar.
The ugly rose again started praying to the gardener to weed him off, but the gardener knew that one day the bee would come to him as he wasnt wrong he was only just being a rose.

I

2007-12-17T12:17:00.000+05:30

I am so empty so shallow
my heart is hollow,
i have only remorse and sorrow,
I wish there was a magical wand that I could borrow
To undo the wrong things that I have done,
I have had emptiness in me for a long time,
I know its wrong maybe its a huge crime,
I cant help it , I dont know what to do,
All i want is happiness,
and all i get i s sorrow,
it leave me hollow,
my heart melts and other things follow,
i need some antidote,
I am poisoned and i can see myself turning blue,
I am going to die and slowly fade awy into the memories of everyone,
I need to break free ....

She

2007-12-10T09:46:00.000+05:30

I wrote this poem in class 12th , when i wrote this I promised myself that one day when I meet the woman of my dreams I would give it to her , sadly I cannot, so its going up here on my blog.

She walketh the path no one ever tread 'afore
She smiled and passed the blessed path bestowed by thee,
she smiled and passed the blessed path as she knew she was free...
She had nothing more to worry...

She talketh the language never spoken 'afore
She twinkled like star blessed by thee,
She had herself love struck,
she had all the beauty and luck
yet she fell in love with me,
a duck , a schmuck ,
a shadowy lane where no one dared to lurk,
a two faced jerk....

Twinkle Twinkle...

2007-12-05T10:07:00.000+05:30

Twinkle Twinkle! starry eyed girl,
I still wonder where you are,
so near yet so far...
Up above the sky so high,
watching you there makes my heart sigh...
Twinkle Twinkle! starry eyed girl,
I still remember your smile,
whatever it was , it was worth its while,
now you are gone and I am still here,
I still try to catch a glimpse of your smile.
I still love your song,though everyone tells me all this is wrong.
I still wait for you,I wait for the starry eyed girl,I wait to see your light,
I still miss your amazonian stride...
Twinkle Twinkle !! starry eyed girl,
I still wonder where you are....

The Ouster

2007-12-01T22:22:00.001+05:30

Get out!Get out!
You shouldn't be here
Don't give me your evil snare.
I want to be alone
I wan to be secluded
I want to be free
I want to run away can't you see...
You eat me inside
I now want my Light
I am fading and I shall end myself tonight
you are the reason for my plight
I wish we never had that fight....
It's over like we decided...
yet you are here?
why are you here?
inside me eating me get out!!
please go i don't need you,
i can't even say I hate you,
I forgive you
but you have to go you have to leave
I have hope now and i won't let go of it,
I am no more empty , i maybe shallow
but it's really that my heart is hollow,
emptiness is a curse for me,
oh god ! cure me!
save me from this perpetuality
this duality this immortality....

Chaos...

2007-12-01T20:17:00.000+05:30

WHAT IS NOT FINISHED TODAY
WILL FIND A WAY TOMORROW TO BE DONE.
INSTEAD OF BEING CONSUMED WITH LIVING.
WE CHOOSE TO MEASURE THE DAY.
TIME IS AN OBSESSION.
A DISTRACTING , RED HERRING.

THAT CONFUSE OUR WAY...

Tomorrow...

2007-12-01T20:15:00.000+05:30

Tommorrow is a promise,
its is pure and its is magical,
Tomorrow is divine,
its presence is benign,
tommorrow is a promise,
a promise of a new day a day of joy ,

Tomorrow is boundless,

Tomorrow is perfect,

Tomorrow is a dream ,

Tomorrow is a perfection its abstract,
its shallow and its deep,

Tomorrow is a sorrow,

Tomorrow is a remorse
for what is not today is left for tomorrow

Tomorrow is nirvana
it is ecstasy it is a new high

Tomorrow is a question
its a string of faith
it is the answer and it is the ultimate
Tomorrow is tears
it is death and birth
for life is until tomorrow
tomorrow is never for
what is tomorrow is today....